Why We Go Off People Who Like Us

Though we long for certain people to like us, an odd thing can happen once they do. What is the origin of our strange coolness towards those who show enthusiasm for us?

Ostensibly we all want love – but oddly, one of the hardest things to do is not to hold it against someone when they do actually turn around and reciprocate our feelings.

It can be immensely hard not to feel that those who offer us love are in some way weak, mistaken, needy, craven or defective – and to be left a little queasy by their warmth, repulsed by their wish to hold us and to caress our necks; by their tender words and their capacity to find minor things about us endearing…