Scientists have revealed the factors that most often destroys the short-term and long-term relationships. Attention between them are poor hygiene and unreliability.
2015 study, which was presented in the publication “Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, had several stages. The first was to identify the factors that people perceive as the main obstacle to relations. The study involved 92 final year students, whose ages ranged from 18 to 53 years. They were asked to name the biggest obstacle to long-term and short-term relationships. The researchers found that men and women following factors count too different, but both groups of respondents presented a much longer list of obstacles to long-term relationships (compared with short-term relationship).
It was then asked 285 undergraduates to evaluate the list of 49 obstacles, which was formed in the first stage of the investigation. They were asked to be numbered in order of importance, as a specific factor would dilute their interest liked person.
Sometimes the people around us let us “get away” with behaviors by not setting boundaries or consequences.
The three most common barriers to short-term relationships:
1. Humans have similar health problems, such as sexually transmitted diseases;
2. Man smells out of sorts;
3. The poor human hygiene.
The three most common barriers to long-term relationships:
1. Man does not control anger or are violent;
2. Man is currently dating multiple partners;
3. Man is unreliable.
The researchers also found that study participants have more influence than positive and negative features of the partner. In other words, a potential partner can not compensate for their undesirable characteristics of the good qualities of character. This is called “prospect theory”, which means that the negative information before our eyes have a greater weight than positive information.
Bad behaviors negatively impact those you love most. Spouses, children, and close family members might be deeply hurt or embarrassed by your behavior habits. But they live with you and often must tolerate these actions. Children in particular don’t have the emotional skills to implement appropriate boundaries or express their frustrations about adult bad behavior.
Bad behavior is frequently a symptom of a bigger issue. If we regularly act out in inappropriate or irritating ways, it’s often a call for further self-awareness. Something deeper (unresolved anger, pain, fear, etc.) may be behind those poor relational skills.
TRY TO HAVE GENUINE “ENCOUNTERS” WITH OTHERS
The aim of an encounter is not necessarily to either fight (or avoid anger), to always be on good terms, or to “love” everyone. It is rather to realize that the basic stuff of life is to contact, interact, feel, and communicate meaningfully with others. A quarrel is often better than complacently ignoring another. To know that you have been true to yourself while meaningfully interacting with another, also being true to them, is a major aim of such an experience like this. It can have
EXPECT PERIODS OF SILENCE
Although they may seem, at first, uncomfortable, creative things can occur in our awareness and our consciousness. Use silence to be aware of what’s happening in you.
Good communication involves clear expressions of not only what you think and feel, but also listening clearly to the words, feelings and behavior communications of others (it is good to attempt to “crawl into another’s skin” or “wear their shoes” in your imagination in order to understand them). There is a strong tendency to “read in” things we feel, while missing what a person is expressing because it bothers us for some reason. Techniques such as repeating back to a person what you thought they said before you answer might be helpful, if it does not demand spontaneity. One can learn to allow for one’s own biases and prejudices which may distort